Today is my best friend’s birthday and I needed Facebook to remind me.
And I was so proud of myself for finally knowing for sure what the date was, after like 6 years.
“Something about the sands of time. Just throw it in!” Pleaded my brother as I helped him write a poem about Fast Food Nation.
Schrodinger’s Douchebag: One who makes douchebag statements, particularly sexist, racist or otherwise bigoted ones, then decides whether they were “just joking” or dead serious based on whether other people in the group approve or not.
MOVING THIS INTO CIRCULATION IMMEDIATELY.
favorite movies: Love Actually (2003)“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion… love actually is all around.”
Also the lesson I learned last night is don’t make out with random people when you’re drunk and at a bar because you will most likely run into them at a graduation party at the end of the year and spend the rest of the night pretending they don’t exist.
ROOMMATE, I HAVEN’T MOVED OUT YET. YOU DON’T LIVE WITH JUST YOUR BOYFRIEND JUST YET. I’M HERE FOR ONE MORE NIGHT. STOP MAKING OUT AND “WRESTLING” WHILE I’M IN THE APARTMENT TOO. OH MY FUCKING GOD
Vikings 1x02 - “We live in a sea of troubles.”
but when i see the way that mankind loves…you could search to the furthest reaches of the universe and never find anything more beautiful.
What is all this bullshit about decorating graduation caps WHEN I GRADUATED WE WEREN’T ALLOWED TO DO SHIT. WE HAD THE STRICTEST DRESS CODE AND GUYS WERE LITERALLY GIVEN TIES IF THEY DIDN’T HAVE ONE, AND THEY MADE US UNZIP OUR GOWNS TO MAKE SURE OUR DRESSES WERE DRESS CODE LENGTH LIKE Y’ALL BITCHES BE SPOILED
I showered. I put on a clean shirt. Look at how great my hair looks. I’m going to this party.
We are adults, Sami. Come.on.
hey what if someone invented a machine that allowed women to transfer their pregnancies to men and then the government passed a law that if a woman didn’t want to have a baby the biological father was required to carry it how fast do you think birth control would stop being an issue
BEST NIGHTBLOG POST EVER
“IT’S UNETHICAL TO FORCE PEOPLE TO CARRY A BABY!!!!” MEN SHOUT
“NO FUCKING SHIT!!!!” WOMEN REPLY